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| Still from "The Alternative Factor" (1967) |
FINAL DRAFT, November 11, 1966
(Includes later page revisions dated November 14-18, 1966)
Report and Analysis by David Eversole
Originally posted at Orion Press
Those seeking to learn more about the genesis of this much disparaged episode will find nothing in this final draft script. Except for a few cut passages of dialogue it is what aired, as confusing and ill-defined. The much-rumored romance between Lazarus and Lieutenant Charlene Masters occurred in an earlier draft (the review of which can be found here).
TEASER
The script calls for the character of Lieutenant Hansen to be at the Helmsman position; Mr. Leslie ultimately delivers his few lines of dialogue in the aired version.
In Ingalls' script, the teaser ends when Lazarus #2 falls from the Vasquez Rocks for the first of three record-holding times, and the Enterprise personnel rush to his aid. In the aired version, the teaser ended several minutes earlier when Kirk and Spock exit the bridge to beam down.
Ingalls describes Lazarus' ship as large and "conical-shaped," and suggests that the interior of it be a redress of the shuttlecraft Galileo set.
ACT ONE
The first two pages of Ingalls' first act are dropped. In the aired version, the act begins with Kirk entering the bridge and receiving a report from Lieutenant Masters.
Ingalls' opening of the act:
FADE IN:
EXT. SPACE - ENTERPRISE ORBITTING
As before.
KIRK'S VOICE
Captain's log, Star Date 3087.6.
Investigating an uncharted planet,
and after encountering incredible
magnetic effects which are beyond
our understanding, we have encountered
a badly injured human being...
INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM
McCoy and two MEDICS enter, carrying a stretcher and impelled by a sense of urgency.
KIRK'S VOICE
He is unable to identify himself
or give us any information. We are
beaming back to the Enterprise,
where medical personnel are standing
by. Meanwhile, Mr. Spock remains
below to continue his examination of
the planet.
A technician is at the transporter console.
Beyond them, our materialization effect... as our entire party, with Kirk supporting the sagging Lazarus #2, materialize. McCoy hurries forward, and as soon as the materialization is completed, he and his medics take Lazarus and put him in the stretcher, McCoy immediately beginning to make readings with his medical recorder.
KIRK
He's in bad shape, Bones.
McCOY
(reacting to Lazarus)
You'll get no argument from me.
(to Medics)
Easy...
The medics set Lazarus on the stretcher while:
McCOY
(continuing; who has
been examining Lazarus,
looks up)
It's going to be touch and go.
Heartbeat practically non-existent.
(to Medics)
Let's get him to Sickbay.
Medics carry Lazarus to door, McCoy and Kirk close behind.
CUT TO:
INT. SICKBAY - ANGLE ON DIAGNOSTIC DEVICE
The indicators are low, barely moving. Pulse light is very weak. CAMERA PULLS BACK to show Kirk with Bones, as McCoy works over Lazarus #2, in one of our beds.
McCOY
What happened down there, Jim?
KIRK
I don't know. He was standing there
. . . said something about needing our
help. . . and he just crumpled.
McCOY
No wonder. After the beating he's
taken.
KIRK
He was beaten?
McCOY
I don't know what else could have
caused it.
KIRK
Bones, that is a dead, lifeless,
arid planet down there. . . no sign
of additional living beings. Who
could have attacked him?
McCoy frowns, stares at the indicator.
McCOY
He's the only one that can answer
that. . . if he lives.
UHURA'S VOICE
(on speaker)
Captain. Just received a standby
notice from Star Fleet Command.
Red Two message about to come in.
KIRK
I'm on my way.
(to McCoy)
Keep me posted, Bones.
McCoy grunts, returning to his work. Kirk exits.
The rest of the act is as aired.
After McCoy tells Kirk of the mysterious disappearing bandage on Lazarus' forehead, in the aired version we cut to Lazarus overhearing Lieutenant Masters discussing the dilithium crystals in the Recreation Room. Lazarus exits to the corridor and the dimensional shift hits him again, just before Kirk and McCoy confront him.
In the script, Lieutenant Masters is not present in the Rec Room. Instead, we have this long scene between Lazarus and a suspicious Spock:
INT. RECREATION ROOM - ANGLE ON SPOCK
He is standing, staring. CAMERA PULLS BACK, SWINGS to reveal Lazarus #2... with no bandage... sitting at a table, taking it all in, watching a few of the other crewmen relaxing. He seems to be quietly enjoying it. Spock moves over to him.
SPOCK
May I sit down?
LAZARUS #2
Yes, of course.
Silence for a moment, Lazarus #2 staring at Spock.
LAZARUS #2
(continuing)
Go ahead, Mr. Spock.
SPOCK
Earlier I referred to you as
a liar.
LAZARUS #2
Do you still think I am?
SPOCK
About some things, yes.
LAZARUS #2
You're very direct. I admire
that.
(smiles)
If it will help make up your
mind about me - ask your questions.
SPOCK
I am curious about this
civilization of yours. . . the one
that was destroyed.
LAZARUS #2
It was. . . much like that of
Earth. Green, soft landscapes. . .
blue seas. . . great cities. . .
science. . . education. . .
SPOCK
And the people?
LAZARUS #2
Like any of us. Good, bad,
beautiful, ugly, magnificent. . .
terrible. Human. Satisfied?
SPOCK
The story you have told us is
most peculiar and unlikely as
is your attitude. You are
hardly the same man I spoke
to earlier.
LAZARUS #2
Don't blame me if I'm not
consistent, Mr. Spock, after
all, not even the universe
is that.
SPOCK
I prefer to think it is.
LAZARUS #2
Yes. Of course you would.
Uhura's voice comes in on the wall communicator.
UHURA
Mr. Spock.
Spock quickly crosses, hits the button.
SPOCK
Yes, Lieutenant.
UHURA'S VOICE
You told me to notify you when
the impulse readings reached the
critical stage. They've done so.
SPOCK
Thank you, Lieutenant.
(turning to Lazarus)
If you will excuse me, I have an
experiment in progress. It may
help me evaluate the facts.
LAZARUS #2
When you are certain of the facts,
will you believe me then?
SPOCK
I always believe in facts.
(beat. . . a close
stare)
I must congratulate you, sir, on
your remarkable recuperative
powers. If time permitted, I
would like to discuss them with
you.
(leaving)
Thank you for your company.
Spock leaves.
The SHIMMER EFFECT then hits Lazarus again, he exits to the corridor, the dimensional shift happens, and Kirk and McCoy confront him (Lazarus #1) as they did in the aired version.
The rest of Act Two and Acts Three and Four were shot as written with no appreciable changes beyond a few deleted or restructured lines.
At its heart, "The Alternative Factor" is a fascinating science fiction idea, but its execution totally dilutes what literacy there may have been in the script. Despite what many fans say, it is possible to keep the two Lazaruses (Lazarii?) separate—possible, but hardly easy. So much concentration is spent trying to remember if it is the positive or negative character who sports the 23rd century Band-Aid that one loses sight of the story.
And that is too bad.
DON INGALLS (1918-2014): Like Gene Roddenberry, he was an officer of the Los Angeles Police Department in the early 1950s before writing for television from 1957 to 1986. Over the course of his career he served as a writer, story editor, producer, and even director. Series he wrote for include Have Gun — Will Travel (also story editor, associate producer, and finally producer), Bonanza, The Virginian (also a producer of select episodes), The Big Valley, Adam-12, Fantasy Island (producer of seasons 4-7 and also a director of two episodes) and T. J. Hooker (also a producer). For Star Trek he wrote "The Alternative Factor" and the story for "A Private Little War" (teleplay by Gene Roddenberry). Ingalls retired to Washington state in 1987, where he completed one novel (The Watchers on the Mountain was published in 2005). He died in 2014 after a long illness. His scripts and production files are publicly accessible at Pepperdine University.
Editor's Note: Although Don Ingalls is the only credited writer of this draft, this is in fact a staff re-write of the episode. There is no indication in the UCLA files who on the staff did this re-write; it could have been Gene Coon, Gene Roddenberry, or Steven Carabatsos. Additionally, although this draft only contains the November 11, 1966 date on its cover, page revisions dated November 14, 15, 16, and 18, 1966 found in the Gene Roddenberry Star Trek Television Series Collection at UCLA confirm that this draft includes many pages revised after the November 11, 1966 date.
Image courtesy of Trek Core.
This article was originally published by Orion Press and is reprinted by permission of publisher Randall Landers. All rights revert to the original authors.
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